Four Simple Steps To Becoming An Effective Communicator

Four Simple Steps To Becoming An Effective Communicator

Posted on 13. May, 2013 by in Character Counts

One of the biggest problems that people face today in terms of dealing with each other is communication. The importance of communication appears to be a lost art form nowadays. The reason why it has diminished in many ways is not only because of the Internet and other forms of communication such as text messaging, instant messaging (IM), and email. Sure, the social networking websites that are prominent today have become the latest means of “catching up”, and cell phones have made contact and availability something that is taken for granted because the access is readily available, but they are not solely to blame.

Emails, text messaging, and IM are tools used for communication – the tools are not the problem. It is how you communicate that is the issue.

Look at all the areas in your life that depends on proper and clear communication:

  • Your marriage
  • Your relationship with your kids
  • Your friendships
  • Your job
  • Your employees, etc.

Clear and effective communication opens the door for results-driven relationships. Meaning, how effectively you communicate determines the level of results. If you cannot motivate or inspire someone to take action or if you cannot connect with someone at their level, you probably will not be able to get that person to do anything.

How can you motivate someone or some group if you cannot connect with them?

How can you expect people to buy into your vision, your dreams, and your business if you cannot communicate effectively with them?

If you cannot relay your visions and dreams in simple terms, why are you surprised that no one wants to participate in helping you reach your goals?

How do you expect your employees to follow you if you continue to send puzzling, confusing, complicated messages?

How can you expect someone to invest in you, to internalize your passion and desires that you have for your business if they don’t know where you are going or want you want to achieve?

Let’s be honest…..on a scale from 1 to 10 (1 being just flat out horrendous and 10 being a level above perfection), how would you rate your communication skills? I figure I’m probably near 5 or 6….my wife would probably say closer to 2 or three, but for the sake of feeling good as I start out this Monday morning, we will stick with 5 or 6. Don’t get me wrong, though, others have and continue to say that I do communicate well and that’s why I been in a few leadership positions at work and in church. People know that I am a good listener and they can sense that I am sincerely interested in their issues and concerns. My issue lies with trying to use too may fancy words to either respond or express myself. That continues to be a bad habit that I have. I’m just trying to impress others when I really don’t need to. Why should someone listening to me have the need to pull out a dictionary every time I talk to him/her. My wife says that my communication is best when I keep it simple. And I tend to keep it simple when I focus on me being the recipient of my messages…..what would I say to myself? How can I phrase what I want to say using the fewest, yet most heartfelt, words? When I keep it short and simple, what I say gets understood and acted upon quickly. Isn’t that how it should be? Words are spoken, delivered with clarity, understood, and acted upon.

Here are a few tips that may help you communicate more effectively:

  1. Keep your message short and to the point. No one should feel compelled to run for a dictionary every time you open your mouth. Be direct which will avoid over complicating your message.
  2. Put yourself in the recipients’ shoes – What would you want to hear?
  3. Live what you preach – Credibility goes a long way when it comes to people opening up to hear what you have to say. Do what you say, then you can say what you do.
  4. Be open to feedback – Oh, this is a hard one for some people. In some minds, people equate feedback with criticism. Thus they limit the amount of feedback or only want to hear from those that will go “easy” on them. Identify those that have a history of being open and honest with you. Have them critique your messages and be willing to adjust it, if needed.

If you put into action the tips above, you will find yourself on the road to effective communication in no time at all. Simplicity, clarity, and credibility will inspire, motivate and light the fire of conviction within your listeners.

13 Responses to “Four Simple Steps To Becoming An Effective Communicator”

  1. James

    08. Jun, 2013

    First, I wanted to say thatI agree 105% that communication is one of the most important issues to work on when running a business.

    I have a question or two about tip number 4. Do you have any advice for getting others to give you constructive criticism? I don’t have a problem with having people tell me what’s wrong with what I’m doing! In fact, I try to encourage it! My problem is people don’t want to look like the “bad guy” so I just get a lot of “Great job, Jim!” and not a whole lot of feedback. What can I do to make the completely not useful “great jobbers” actually give me feedback I can use?

    Reply to this comment
    • mpibadministrator


      09. Jun, 2013

      Good question….it starts with encouraging them to be honest about their opinion. You can tell them you appreciate their support, but the best thing they can do for you is provide objective feedback. Just let them know that it will do so much more for you in the long run.

      Reply to this comment
  2. Paolo

    12. Jun, 2013

    I agree completely. Communication is really a vital part of relationships, both social and professional.

    But I have a question in terms of a managerial perspective regarding item #2. Do you know some tips of how to deliver a message or comment without actually hurting the recipient?

    Reply to this comment
    • Big Dave

      Big Dave

      13. Jun, 2013

      Good question….it really depends on the personality of the recipient. Have you observed their responses to what may be perceived as criticism? I have a few friends that I can deliver constructive criticism and know that their feelings will not be hurt in any way. Then, there are others close to me that I have to really dress up my message as I know that will take it personally and either try to get back at me in some form or shut it down completely. So, again, it depends on the recipients personality. With you being in some sort of managerial position, your goal is to try to get the best out of the person, so you want to avoid taking a blanket approach to delivering messages to those you manage….customize your approach and I believe you will be fine.

      Reply to this comment
  3. Sky

    16. Jun, 2013

    Communication is so important! I would also rank myself around a 5 or 6 when it comes to communicating – I can often get my point across and people seem to be aware that I am genuinely interested and care but, at the same time, I sometimes have so much going on in my head that my thoughts and ideas get all jumbled.

    I especially love #3, though – that’s a rule I try to follow daily!

    Reply to this comment
    • Big Dave

      Big Dave

      16. Jun, 2013

      I certainly know what it’s like to have so much going on that it mixes you up from time to time. Rule #3 and #4 are the most difficult to me…but, if you can be consistent with them, you’ll see positive, lasting changes in your life.

      Reply to this comment
  4. BreatheOut

    21. Jun, 2013

    But some people have a hard time taking criticisms even when it’s for their own good. That’s just the irk of giving advice sometimes.

    Reply to this comment
    • Big Dave

      Big Dave

      23. Jun, 2013

      You’re right….it is an irk. But their inability to take advice is on them. Someday they’ll realize that you were only trying to help….

      Reply to this comment
    • nomansalehzada

      19. Jul, 2013

      Yeah Breathe i have also came across similar type of issues when i advice some one

      Reply to this comment
  5. John

    21. Aug, 2013

    You can never overestimate the impact that effective communication can have on a business! Excellent tips, especially about being not only willing to listen to feedback, but to act on it to constantly improve!

    Reply to this comment
  6. Mia

    14. Feb, 2014

    Proper communication is the key to a healthy relationship. I think communication is very important in every aspect of our life, and to be able to communicate and relay your message well to people is an achievement. Everyone knows how to talk, but only a few can communicate. I think to communicate with someone, there should be an understanding between them, one will talk, the other will listen, and when it’s the other’s turn to talk, the one will also listen in return. No use interrupting one another, I think.

    Reply to this comment
  7. Gale

    14. Feb, 2014

    I think communication is two way, it’s not just you do all the talking. You also have to know when the proper time to just listen is and the time where you can voice out your opinion. It’s also more of how well you listen so you can establish good communication with someone. Imagine if someone continues to listen to you but if you ask for their opinion, they don’t have any because they didn’t listen to a single word you just said. Right there is how communication is lost.

    Reply to this comment
  8. Beatrice

    14. Feb, 2014

    It’s probably hard to be open to feedback. I must admit I’m not very good at it, but you’re right, it’s important to get the feedback of the people you can trust to be open and honest about listening to your message. After all, the only way to get better is to know the things you’re not very good at, and adjust it from there.

    Reply to this comment

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